Tag Archives: health

Buying a House! – $438k – July 2025

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Wake up, wake up, wake up
It’s the first of the month (wake up, wake up)
So get up, get up, get up
So cash your checks and come up (get up, get up)

So yeah it’s July 1, 2025, the month of June was a jam packed one. My bf and I went to Porto, Paris, Versaille, Leeds Castle, and London all on one trip. As non world-traveled person I was a little overwhelmed with the notion but decided to plan ahead as much as possible. I call this a once in a lifetime trip. I took over 1,900 pictures, these are some of the better ones.

7/1/20255/31/2025Difference% Change7/1/2024YoY Diff% Change
401K$ 348,738$ 328,591$ 20,1476.1%$ 273,612$ 75,12627.5%
Roth IRA$ 57,216$ 53,866$ 3,3506.2%$ 42,536$ 14,68034.5%
Brokerage Accts$ 3,710$ 3,278$ 43213.2%$ 3,079$ 63120.5%
Cash$ 23,743$ 26,917$ (3,174)-11.8%$ 3,222$ 20,521636.9%
HSA*$ 4,691$ 3,523$ 1,16833.1%$ 3,799$ 89223.5%
Total$ 438,098$ 416,174$ 21,9235.3%$ 326,248$ 111,85034.3%
Credit Cards$ –$ –$ –#DIV/0!$ –$ –#DIV/0!
Auto Loan$ –$ –$ –#DIV/0!$ 8,853$ (8,853)-100.0%
Net Total$ 438,098$ 416,174$ 21,9235.3%$ 317,395$ 120,70338.0%

Onto the monthly financial updates, I am up 5.3% or $22k thanks to my savings and an uptick in the market. My HSA is asterisked because I don’t think I fully captured the balance in previous months. It’s a good amount on paper and I’m glad the number is going up. To be up $121k or 38% a year just blows my mind though. When I started this blog 13 years ago I was just trying to get to breakeven. My how times have changed. A few days ago I chagned my 401k contribution amount to get the match. No more, no less. It may slow my progress a bit but shit I have some other short term priorities.

So as far as the home buying process is concerned. Let me run it down.
1 – The townhouse I liked but had reservations on due to the fact it was a townhouse with an HOA with a small driveway and over 2200 sq ft. Just too much space for 2 people if you ask me. Not to mention the expected utility costs. Also the adjacent unit was under renovation and who knows what the neighbors you share a wall will be like.
2 – The house I really really fell for. It had a pretty new roof, lots of natural light, vaulted ceilined. However the elderly man had mobility issues and was adamant about doing a leaseback where he’d rent from me until the time the property was sold. Looking back maybe that was a blessing in disguise, it was under 1300 sq ft and a 2/2 and the seller actually raised the price the same day I made my offer. Wild. Then we discovered it needed some major foundation work. Plus there were issues with improper drainage which was apparent with the mud in the backyard and there wasn’t any grass on the property just mulch. So that was a bust, lost my inspection money but got the earnest money back relatively quickly.
3 – House I currently have an offer on. Inspection was supposed to happen yesterday but wasn’t told the bathroom was going to be ripped apart prior to the inspector showing up. Oops. So it might happen today or possibly another day. This property has the foundation work already done along with renovations. Closing is supposed to happen early August. Really hoping third time is a charm. I’ve seen over 15 individual properties and driven past an additional 10 before ruling them out. No duplexes, nothing that looks like someone died or was tortured in the home, nothing with major foundation work needed. It’s a 3/2, over 1500 sq ft. a deck, privacy fence. I’m excited but also a bit cautious about the process especially managing it on one income the first year. One way or another I’ll be out of this apartment by late August.

I will need about $19k at closing, plus the cost of movers, paying the homeowners + car insurance upfront of ~$3,200 and maybe buying a new couch. So let’s say $6k between now and then. Hence why I’m temporarily pulling back on the retirement, maybe until the end of the year and ramping back up for 2026. Six month emergency fund target is $18k and it’s going to be challenging to hit with one income contributing to the mortgage.

On a positive note the bathroom remodel looks pretty nice, that just got finished today. Pardon the dirt inside, that’s leftover from the construction. Beforehand it was this cheap fiberglass stuff that was attached to the wall securely but tapping on it felt cheap and made me think ok how long is this going to last. This also will help with resale value. Also I likely won’t be doing any major home repairs in the first year or so. The big thing as long as it’s in my power to do so is not to put any expenses on credit cards that won’t be paid in full over the course of a month.

I’m supposed to get a detailed inspection report soon likely tomorrow or Saturday. Took notes of things called out by the inspector.
1. Water pressure – low, also some leaking near water main. Gave demo of bathtub and sink water running at same time, sink dropped to a trickle. Is it a major plumbing issue or something minor?
2. Insulation in attic – not fully insulated, makes A/C work harde
3. Electrical box – Safety concerns no ground rod and wiring for some of the outlets
4. Carpenter ants – frass in front bedroom window – needs to be treated.
5. Washer dryer hookup – No vent from where the dryer would physically be, currently located on other side of the building. 
6. A/C 5 ton unit should be 2.5 so may be oversized for the house – inspector to lookup and verify
7. HVAC system not intaking enough air for the unit, temp drops too quickly without dehumidifying the ai
8. Roof – minor damaged from tree branch exposed fasteners
9. Leak in the master bedroom ceiling – Staining but not sure if root cause was fixed
10. Dishwasher – Kitchen – Doesn’t open fully without hitting the oven due to the narrow clearances / handle sticking out of bottom tray. Dishwasher was originally on the opposite side of the sink and moved over.
11.Garbage disposal – not functioning in the kitchen likely needs to be replaced.
12. Microwave – Have addendum for stainless steel, still see the white microwave in there as of 7/4

Foundation looks good but was told I will likely will see cracks in the walls over the next year as it settles. Inspector recommends leaving it for a year then doing the surface-level repairs. There is another home I was going back and forth on but hate the kitchen and kitchen layout though I do like the solar aspect of it. Everything has tradeoffs, I still like what I see overall. though in current state I’d give it a 6.5/10, getting fixes for some of the big items would bring that up to an 8. I don’t want the hassle of trying to address things myself plus some of the basic things will really lower the appraisal of the seller doesn’t address. I haven’t hit the buy button on furniture or appliances yet but weighing different options. I have a couple factors working in my favor but we’ll see. I still want out of this apartment. Fingers crossed on the third one being a charm. My option period ends in under a week. 😬

Anyway thanks for reading this if you’re still out there. Happy 4th of July! Pictures below taken 7/3/25 at a nearby Home Depot parking lot as I was going to buy work gloves. Peace out.

Shaken & Stirred – May 2025: $386k

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I’m currently going through the gamut of emotions right now. My employer recently went through a round of layoffs. Hundreds of good people losing their job through no fault of their own, the unfortunate outcome of mergers & acquisitions. A tale as old as time at least since people started working for corporations since the early 20th century.

I found this image illustrating the 5 stages of Grief. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance.
Denial – I saw news stories about the event before it happened. I knew there would be some changes but nothing of this magnitude.
Anger – I tend to project others emotions on myself. How could they do this? Why couldn’t they have offered these people other jobs? Why weren’t more options given?
Bargaining – Could I have done anything to prevent this happening to the people on my team or the ones that I work with. Not really, I wasn’t consulted at all during this process.
Depression – Should I stay here? Should I jump ship? Should I start looking for other jobs, in *this* economy?!! Should I pause these plans to move out of my apartment? Am I going to be next?
Acceptance – The reality is I was *not* part of those who were laid off, though my role is changing in ways also not in my control. My salary is unchanged and I still get to work remotely. My leaders think highly enough of me to keep me on the team and it’s not my first time at the rodeo. The people impacted received severence pay and should also be eligible for unemployment. Some of them I’m sure were burned out in their previous roles but kept the fire burning hot. A few people who used to work for my employer seem a lot more relaxed after moving away from this particular industry.

Dealing with Layoffs

5 Stages of Grief

Recent Purchase Wise I spent on a few items.

  1. Gift for best friend from NY – His wife is about to deliver a baby and I could afford to spare the cash
  2. Standing desk from Flexispot – The reality is I was sitting in front of a computer and sort of hunched over about 12 hours a day. That isn’t healthy and I need to definitely get out more. In the meantime though I’m focused on making small changes. It’s also quite sturdy and able to handle a 352lb of weight. The E6 Max standing desk was $346.39 after tax is included the top at least was made in Vietnam and I don’t think impacted by the tariffs. The first one I got unfortunately had a hairline crack right in the middle of it. I called the 1800 number after hours and a rep helped me immediately. All I had to do was send over pictures and just a few days later the new top was at my door. It was annoying to reassemble half of the desk but having a box nearly as tall as I am in my small living room also wasn’t an option.
  3. Walking Pad – Along with working from home there’s a strong need for me to keep my body moving. Staying stationary I think is one of the factors contributing to my recent weight gain along with other health challenges. After my most recent bloodwork I need all the help I can get. $248.96 after a $40 coupon was applied and tax. There was a price drop after the fact I couldn’t take advantage of thanks to Amazon’s rigid price match policies. Both of these I wouldn’t normally splurge on but I had a slight financial windfall in April that is working to my favor.
  4. Expensive dinners – Well expensive to me, close to $100-$112 with tips for 2 people. Try to limit to once a week. With current prices I suppose it’s not that bad once you include alcohol. My bf also cooks meals for us and will cover some of the cheaper meals when we go out so it’s even. I also earn a higher salary so it’s fair.
  5. Clothes – I got some on clearance from J Crew Factory and some from the Penguin Store. Happy with the result, but still think a could use a few more items. In denial about it still but XL polos don’t fit me anymore unless they’re slightly oversized. Sitting down and having my belly stick out is not a good look.
  6. Groceries – I did two food orders from Whole Foods. One was $177, the other was $111. Also made a few other runs. I don’t always have the energy to go food shopping after a long day or get up early enough to do it all before work. Plus asking people for custom cuts of meat can be a little bit exhausting especially with a line of people aside from trying comb through the aisles to find the best deals. Online I can see the prices and what’s on sale without any confusion. Is it lazy? Extremely. Is it cheaper than ordering doordash delivery or driving to get fast food? Certainly.

The crack not heard around the world

The latest news stories are talking about the impact of tariffs to the supply chain and potential empty shelves. I don’t know what the oucome of this will be. I don’t want to panic buy anything. My electronics are good for a while if prices suddenly go up. Clothes are good. If I have to button things down I can. I’ve been looking at cars again (either more powerful, more spacious interior, or electric) but the one I have is perfectly fine aside from it being kinda on the slow side.

Ok onto the finance piece. My net worth is now the equvalent of an Intel microprocessor that popular during my youth. Good ole reliable 386, $386k that is. +$10k or +2.7% where I was last month. I lucked out in terms of money coming my way and for that I’m blessed. My cash levels are at record highs for me but still not enough for a down payment on a home. I also don’t qualify for any down payment programs. The home values haven’t gone down *that* much and trust me I have been looking daily. I may do a 10% down payment and move into a property that meets most of my needs that is $350k or less. The work news makes me a little worried though and all signs point to housing getting cheaper in the next 12 months. My lease is up in close to 3. If I ride it out one more year I can get to 20% down and have an emergency fund. Do I want to do that though, 10 years in this apartment and I’m not getting any younger. I’m also borderline depressed being in such a small, physically dark place 16+ hours a day.

You may recall in my start of year post my net worth estimate for the end of the year was $455k. I no longer think that is feasible and $426k seems more realistic, perhaps less if I buy.

Compared to a year ago my total investments are up 27%, cash is up 500%, and through aggressive contributions my retirement account balances are up 21-26%. I’m tired often but pushing through. At some point I might not have the option to invest all this money. Hopefully that’s not for a long time but try to plan for all possibilities. I do get paid again Friday, $1k of that will go to savings, $293 into the Roth IRA, $920-ish to the 401k plus matching. The avg American can’t afford an $500 expense, I was there almost 15 years ago.

Well off to bed now I’m tired.

4/29/20253/28/2025Difference% Change5/4/2024YoY Diff% Change
401K$ 306,755$ 303,119$ 3,6371.2%$ 254,172$ 52,58320.7%
Roth IRA$ 50,234$ 49,814$ 4200.8%$ 39,986$ 10,24825.6%
Brokerage Accts$ 2,827$ 2,494$ 33313.3%$ 2,415$ 41117.0%
Cash$ 22,862$ 17,209$ 5,65332.8%$ 3,846$ 19,016494.4%
HSA$ 3,400$ 3,415$ (15)-0.4%$ 3,056$ 34411.2%
Total$ 386,078$ 376,050$ 10,0282.7%$ 303,476$ 82,60227.2%
Credit Cards$ –$ 93$ (93)-100.0%$ –$ –#DIV/0!
Auto Loan$ –$ –$ –#DIV/0!$ 11,555$ (11,555)-100.0%
Net Total$ 386,078$ 375,957$ 10,1212.7%$ 291,921$ 94,15732.3%

Great Depression 2025? March 2025 – $394k

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If you follow social media closely you’d think we’re in the middle of the great depression. The current administration is doing layoffs left and right. Across NOAA, USAID, IRS, SSA, Labor Dept, EPA, NHTSA, FEMA, TSA, HUD, Dept of Defense, NIH/CDC, Dept of Energy, Dept of Education, Department fo Veterans Affairs, U.S. Forest Service, Personnel Management, National Nuclear Safey Admin, GSA, FAA. About 30,000 people most of whom were contributing valuable services to the nation.

Layoffs.fyi screenshot March 2, 2025

Let’s not forget the private sector, going off https://layoffs.fyi there have been a slew of them across many different sectors. Thousands more high paying mostly white color jobs wiped out in an economy where it’s harder to find a job than ever. With over 1.6 million unemployed looking for job and the process taking at least 6 months having you balance sheet right can mean the difference between being homeless or having cushion to lower stress.

For me, my employer last week went through a round of layoffs. I wasn’t directly impacted but there are people I’ve worked with over the years that were. It makes me sad and wonder will I be next. How do I make myself Indespensible to the team to show my value. Also what skills do I need to brush up on to add to my value in the marketplace. My job is far from perfect but I try to give it 100% daily and be an effective leader of people.

Mr. Money Mustache recently made a post Wow, have you seen the stock market lately? I encourage you to take a look at. TLDR is the S&P500 has had a crazy run up and we may be due for a correction. It’s still going to be profitable in the long run and the economy will continue to grow. Ignore the headlines, enjoy you life and keep on investing. I’m very much inclined to agree with him. I look back at the top news stories from 20 years ago. That was 7,300+ days ago. Most of the headlines elicit a wow that happened kind of response but aside from national disasters they don’t impact our day to day lives much. If your eyes are glued to the latest updates on X, Fox / MSNBC / CNN, etc. you’ll drive yourself insane. Give me the archive version and keep the party moving.

If I do end up getting laid off…
1. Company has a severence package in place – I’d rather not disclose the amt but it’s significant and would be close to 22 weeks worth of pay.
2. I currently have a stockpile of cash that I’ve been saving for a potential home purchase – Almost $12k
3. There are things I could sell for close to $1k if neded
4. I have a Roth IRA that I can pull from without penalties. My cost basis might not be exactly right but it’s close to $30k
5. 401k hardship distribution – Not ideal given the need to grow the investments, and 10% penalty
6. 401k loan
Per Fidelity: With a 401(k) loan, you borrow money from your retirement savings account. Depending on what your employer’s plan allows, you could take out as much as 50% of your vested account balance or $50,000, whichever is less. An exception to this limit is if 50% of the vested account balance is less than $10,000: in such a case, the participant may borrow up to $10,000.
7. If I really really had to I could break my lease and move back in with parents 1600 miles away but that literally would be the option of last resort.
8. Unemployment would cover some of my expenses – Maximum weekly unemployment benefit is $577 available for up to 26 weeks. That’s $15k.
9 Sell my car currently valued at $34,400 on Carvana and get something 10 years old and significantly cheaper. A 2015 version of my vehicle is about $18k. That’s $16k right there.

Hopefully things stay secure and I never have to leverage any of the above options. I do believe in being prepared just in case. I’ve been keeping my momentum going on this blog for 13 years I don’t want to start going back now.

Enough about that, what the heck have I been up to the past month?
1. Filed taxes for 2024. I paid sooo much in taxes and still owed a little under $200.
2. Sold the wheels from last month on eBay. Got a few lowball offers and ended up settling at $85 plus the cost of shipping. My payout was ~$107. I’m not sure how the math works on that. I’m sure they’ll bill me for it again later.
3. Was getting over a bit of a nagging cough that wouldn’t go away. It’s 90% better now but super annoying and was at my whit’s end.
4. Covid / Flu shot – It’s the season of people getting sick including 3 people on my dodgeball team
5. Finished dodgeball – Fun season and I managed to avoid getting injured so that’s a plus.
6. Saw this cute art exhbit in Grapevine TX dedicated to Wicked. I saw the movie “only” once but go a little crazy with the soundtrack hahaha.

7. Getting back into the fitness journey flow. It tires me out sometimes but it beats the alternative option. I also am learning I don’t drink nearly as much water as I should be. My energy levels are higher, my skin is clearer, along with other benefits.
8. Friends and I did an escape room for a friend’s birthday and watched the Superbowl together. Kendrick Lamar deserves all the accolates he’s been receiving lately. Not Like Us and Humble are my jams.

Ok ok let’s talk about a net worth update.

3/2/20252/2/2025Difference% Change3/1/2024YoY Diff% Change
401K$ 320,732$ 324,256$ (3,524)-1.1%$ 247,070$ 73,66229.8%
Roth IRA$ 52,922$ 53,272$ (351)-0.7%$ 37,111$ 15,81142.6%
Brokerage Accts$ 2,321$ 2,016$ 30415.1%$ 2,189$ 1326.0%
Cash$ 14,303$ 11,975$ 2,32819.4%$ 3,589$ 10,714298.5%
HSA$ 3,537$ 3,562$ (25)-0.7%$ 3,067$ 47015.3%
Total$ 393,814$ 395,082$ (1,267)-0.3%$ 293,026$ 100,78834.4%
Credit Cards$ –$ 166$ (166)-100.0%$ 440$ (440)-100.0%
Auto Loan$ –$ –$ –#DIV/0!$ 15,314$ (15,314)-100.0%
Net Total$ 393,814$ 394,915$ (1,101)-0.3%$ 277,272$ 116,54242.0%

My net worth in the middle of the month got as high as $404k then with some of the recent economic updates it went down. Am I at the mercy of the markets? Yes and I’ve been recently trying to diversify slightly away from that while also leveraging Dollar-Cost-Averaging.

I’m not quite a dividend investor. However I am chugging along slowly with my 4-4.5% in a high yield savings account. So far my little balance has yielded my $80 since December. My FEPI investment (cost basis ~$1008 current value $942) paid $20 in dividends in Feb, $20.86 in Jan, $21.16 in late December. Mid December I got a $536 dividend payment from FZROX in my Roth IRA. For My 401k I Got a $3,079 dividend from FSKAX. I got a few other dividends, $7 here, $2.50 there. It all adds up

Am I bummed about my net worth being down from the start of February? Not really. $1k decline is really nothing in the grand scheme of things. I’m still up over $116k from where I was last year. I also expect to see extra income come through this month and will likely end up with 50% more cash than I have today. A year ago I had about 3 months rent set aside in cash. The average person would struggle to handle a $500 unexpected expense without using a credit card. Meanwhile I’m living the debt free lifestyle with a healthy amount of cash reserves. So even if the $2k/mo I’m setting aside on top of other expenses / investments makes me feel “forced poverty” sometimes, it’s for a good purpose.

Throughout the week I look at homes for sale, the prices are coming down. Currently there are 3 homes in the development I once lived in. They aren’t selling. The homes I think are nice average out to be about $385k most of them are 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom. That’s a $77k downpayment. I have 18% of that right now and my lease ends mid-August 2025. That’s basically 5 months away…
3 bedroom homes in the area:

So the next question… Do I need a 3 bedroom home for 2 people? Well, I do work from home and dedicated “office” space would be nice instead of working from my bedroom or living room. Plus if my partner moves in with me he should have his own space. Same for if my parents come to visit though that hasn’t happened in over 6 years…

2 bedroom homes:
These two bedroom homes are priced a bit lower but not *that* much cheaper. I will say the some of these look a bit more modern. About $30k cheaper in some cases the savings are more. Those savings of $40k-$70k add up. I can look in other areas too, a change of pace could do me a bit of good.

I looked at condos in the area as an option, but one had an $812/mo. GTFO here with that nonsense. Another option had that fee at $609/mo. With the insurance included I guess it’s not soooo bad but stil let’s say that’s $200 of it. “All Facilities, Association Management, Insurance, Maintenance Grounds, Sewer, Trash, Water”. You don’t have a garage to park your car in, or a driveway and still have taxes on top of that. Another property it didn’t include insurance on for $451/mo. Then no guarantee they won’t jack up the HOA dues again the next month. These units also don’t move quickly. One property has been on the market for 190 days and they also historically don’t appreciate at the same rate as stand-alone homes.

I’m still looking and hoping the prices keep coming down more. There are so many units on the market right now. I also hope that I don’t lose my job since that could push things back a longggg time. In any case I’ll keep saving and to have the ability to do that I’m thankful. Going to focus on the things I can control and try to adapt to the ones I cannot to the best of my ability. Off to enjoy the rest of my Sunday now. Cheers!

Feb 2025 Starting the Year Off Right? Sorta… – $395k

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January was a weird month for me. I started out at a friend’s gathering then I got sick and developed a nagging cough that wouldn’t completely go away. I took a really strong antibiotic which the nurse practitioner said to take it if I needed to. It just made me feel worse. I’m about 90% good now but the cough still comes and goes.

  1. After getting a scrape on one of my wheels I bought a new one… For almost $550 brand new at a discount from a company that supplies parts for Acuras. I unsuccessfully tried to get a guy to come out and repair them who ghosted me, then the place I got repair done from previously wants to charge $200 and keep them 2 days plus they’re about 32 miles away which is not very convenient. I have the old one on eBay right now but no bites. Slowly lowering the price down to see what happens.
Brand new wheel

2. We had snow, likely for the only time this year. Everything basically came to a grinding halt. I enjoyed pictures of it from afar online.
3. Bf and I went to this really wondeful light snow on the outskirts of Dallas called Astra Lumina. We both really enjoyed it and it was pretty empty. 100% worth it.

4. Getting back in the flow of playing sports. I wore these leggings out for the first time and it was an adjustment. My body is a little stiff from yesterday but at least myt face is good after getting hit right in the face with a dodgeball.

5. Checked out fun restaurants and bars including Boxcar and Copper and Vine. I’m giving myself more grace with drinking, light drinking 1-2 drinks a week is my limit. I’m all about the vibe. These places aren’t cheap but it’s good for us to go out and occasionally indulge after long week.

6. I made a few clothing purchases and cologne. Trying to do samples to figure out what I like and use those sparingly for when I go out. Altogether it was about $280 and one item I gave away to my bf since it didn’t fit, another I bought twice since I thought I threw it out by accident so now I have 3 packs of samples.
7. For Retirement – The Roth IRA is maxed out for 2024. This Friday I’ll make my first 2025 contribution. I hate making the contributions honestly but it’s for my future. I was “only” able to contribute 96% or $22,125.05 to my 401k last year out of a $23k limit. YTD I’m at $1,840 plus matching. Each month this year I project to see a NW increase of ~$2500/mo or $30k/yr from the estimated return rate of my investments.
8. Housing – I’m still saving for a home but at the rate housing prices and interest rates aren’t coming down this may take longer than expected. Almost $10k a month in to the near year is a good start though. One of my IG friends who is a realtor essentially said come be my neighbor, the place looked amazing but $500k though. Most people under 40 aren’t going to be able afford that. Maybe couples, situations with 3 people on the mortgage, families with generational wealth, or the top 10%, but still. That’s a $100k down payment and $3k a month not including utilities, maintenance, HOA, etc. $300k is about the sweet spot in terms of what a home looks like and what I think I’d be able to afford. I believe in math. Do I have a little FOMO when I see someone in Forney that has a whole house and probably has half my salary? Yes a little bit, however that would be 40 miles from my bf’s job or up to 2 hour drive after work on a weekday. That and no one I know lives out there. Fuck that haha.
9. For time preservation, algorithm, and mental health reasons. I’ve decided to try and be 80-90% apolitical online but it’s hard. Even with the exclusion of certain mutes words and , me not personally posting political content it’s E-V-E-R-Y-W-H-E-R-E. That and the number of things to get outraged over seems to be rising exponentially. A cousin in Kentucky came across a flyer related to a divisive group’s meetings and was hoping it’s fake but it ‘s real. It’s always been there but now the people are coming out of the woodwork. The best revenge is living a good life so that’s what I’ll keep going. Also not going to any of those areas that want to take us back to the dark ages of segregation.
10. Stepdad’s home is finally sold, he’s been handling the finances of it since 1997 and the proceeds are significant. He worked 2 jobs for years to keep it all afloat and I’m glad he doesn’t have to worry about it anymore, though now he wants to build a home on a parcel of land he owns to avoid cap gains taxes. It sounds crazy to me, but then again I don’t want to deal with tenants especially in NY.

Ok here are the actual numbers…

February 2025 Net Worth Update
2/2/202512/27/2024Difference% Change1/31/2024
401K$ 324,256$ 315,581$ 8,6752.7%$ 232,746
Roth IRA$ 53,272$ 51,574$ 1,6983.3%$ 34,506
Brokerage Accts$ 2,016$ 1,644$ 37222.6%$ 2,031
Cash$ 11,975$ 11,896$ 790.7%$ 4,448
HSA$ 3,562$ 3,559$ 30.1%$ 2,725
Total$ 395,082$ 384,254$ 10,8282.8%$ 276,456
Credit Cards$ 166$ –$ 166#DIV/0!$ 87
Auto Loan$ –$ –$ –#DIV/0!$ 16,536
Net Total$ 394,915$ 384,254$ 10,6612.8%$ 259,833

I’m up about $11k over last month and $135k to last year. I get paid on Friday and trying to keep my spending in check. The credit card payments are scheduled to bring it down to 0 but haven’t posted yet. I might hit $400k net worth this month but it’s a little iffy since right now at least it looks like I may owe $1200 in taxes. Am I excited about this milestone? Eh a little bit. Most of my money I’m not touching until hopefully until I’m 59.5. It’s all relative though, I consider myself one of the fortunate ones… Especially with all the ruckus happening with the federal government and tech sectors. Not to mention all the wildfires in Los Angeles. My problems are important to me but also small by comparison.

I have a really bad case of cabin fever right now but it’s supposed to be warmer this week. Doing things with friends in your 40s on a whim is near impossible. I think they assume I’m busy when I’m not or when I do ask them they are busy. What can you do though… Basically plan stuff on my own and maybe I’ll run into people I know. A big chunk of my 20s / 30s was spent hoping people would like me, to a fault. Now I’m like yeah it would be nice but not losing sleep over it. I can do fun stuff too and being fancy if I choose to be isn’t breaking my finances.

Last but not least one of our family friends going back to the 1980s passed away recently at the age of 84. She was one of the nicest people I’ve met and never complained about anything. She came to NY from the south almost 50 years ago with nothing. She made many friends, became like family in many ways, worked at a nursing home and volunteered at a church. I haven’t seen her since I left NY but my mom would stay in touch. The years go by quickly, make the most of them. I watched an hour long service from the church on YouTube. It was very touching.

Stay strong even if your finances are down right now. Long term history suggests things will continue to go up so that’s that I’m going to focus on. Much love to you all.

To the Two Comma Club – Dec 2024 – $383k

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Assuming I stop investing completely and market returns stay at current rates I’ll double my portfolio from the current $373k as of a few days ago to $735k in 8.5 years or 2032. Then double it again and hit ~$1.5M in 2040. I will be 57 years old then and presumably retired or very close to it.

In practice I’m putting about $1,986 of my own money aside monthly in 401k plus let’s say $745/mo of matching. Not including Roth, crypto, or brokerage account. So that’s $2,731. At that rate I will double my portfolio to $756k in 5 years. If I could hold that pace for 5 more years I hit $1.3M 5 years from now or 2035 at 52. That’s independent of money I’m putting into a Roth IRA, high yield savings account, bonuses / the rest of my income, or may go to a potential home.

Not stressing about any of this really. If it happens great, if not I will keep focusing on things and people who matter in my life. 2024 has been a year of uncertainty,. A friend got laid off a few weeks ago, a former coworker was looking for employment for close to a year and took a demotion, another who left voluntarily got laid off elsewhere not only once but twice.

I spend a ton of money this month but mostly for good things.
1. Tire – Got a new set of tires – $1,392.13 – TLDR on this is I drove to Arkansas and my tire started to make a bit of a noise. I had the car aligned several times, along with tires balanced before so this was odd. The Discount Tire rep said 3 of the tires balanced but the one I had issues with wouldn’t balance. He then showed me irregular wear on the tire and what looked like a liter of liquid sloshing around. The car is AWD so it’s recommended to replace all 4 tires at once. So the car I bought October 2023 at Grubbs Acura of Grapevine, TX had tire sealant the time I purchased it. I e-mailed a few people there and got a pretty generic response. I was fuming because it could have resulted in the tire sidewall exploding and I drove 10k miles with the tire in that state. I was able to pay if off that week with money I had saved up. I was pissed though. The car rides much quieter and I get road hazard coverage / free rotations for multiple years.
2. Europe flight and seat upgrades – American Airlines $1,737.23 – I knew the expense was coming. Did I want to make the payment this early? Not really but I’m going to have a blast
3. Dodgeball team membership – $90.50 – Since the kickball season stopped and we’re not doing cornhole I wanted some type of social outlet with people I knew. Missed the early brid pricing by a few days oops.
4. MacBook Pro $2,899 plus tax – Got $2,252 for the old one. Wasn’t going to replace but the big bulky 16″ barely fit on my desk. and discouraged my from going out anywhere with it. The specs are a slight downgrade in terms of amount of memory and GPU cores but the system is faster than my own one so real world it just uses more of its RAM and a tiny bit of swap space.
5. Wicked tickets… j/k on that one but great movie. The acting, special effects, and the music. This film had a huuuge $145M budget.

Inside of old tire wearing abnormally and new tire

The 2024 Edition laptop – M4 Max MacBook Pro

Sharing a couple pictures from my camera roll in November.. Lots of Christmas. experiences. 😀

On the health front I was sick for a few days but my blood pressure also was sky high 152/97. I was drinking lots of water, taking garlique and dandelion root, going for walks whenever possible. It was working for a while until it wasn’t. The other medication I was on just ruined my GI system. High blood pressure is the silent killer so I openly accepted going back on another medication with the hopes of getting back into normal range. Numbers are back to normal again. Since the election I’ve been down about 10 pounds so it’s helping. I also no longer am active on X / Twitter instead favoring Mastodon and Blusky. The X algo would constantly show me performative outrage, political content I never asked for, its owner’s comments non-stop, and videos that go viral for all the wrong reasons. The platform is polarizing, toxic, and quiet honestly a waste of time. Garbage in, garbage out.

My net worth is at an all-time high. I am having doubts about being able to afford a home by August 2025. A common rule of thumb is to not exceed 28% of your take home on housing expenses. That with my aggressive retirement investing would be about $1708 (good luck finding a mortgage payment that cheap) and then a Ramit Sethi video said add 50% to that to account for all kinds of additional expenses. So $2,562…

Up $24k in a month due to a recent surge in the market. Doubtful this momentum will continue but I’m pushing as much as I can. $400k by March? Def a possibility. It doesn’t feel real though. 12/2/23 I was at $233,478 so a +64% or +$149k gain in a year. I’m extremely thankful and vividly remember the -$45k I came from when starting this blog. Still working on stacking cash but it takes time.. Alright it’s after 3am I should be in bed now.

12/1/202411/1/2024Difference% Change
401k319,005297,76421,241+7.1%
Roth IRA51,30847,9773,332+6.9%
Brokerage Accts1,346882465+52.7%
Cash7,6038,686-1,083-12.5%
HSA3,5613,49071+2%
Total382,824358,79924,025+6.7%
Credit Cards166–166
Auto Loan–––
Net Total382,658358,79923,859+6.6%

Forecasting The Future – May 2024 – $292k

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My Life and Month in pictures.

  1. On a whim we decided to see this Barbie Experience activity at a nearby mall here. It wasn’t crowded when we went and I really enjoyed the level of detail that went into each exhibit.
  2. A CosMc’s (branch of the McDonald’s franchise) recently opened here. I really was impressed at the exterior design and concept. However the execution left me wanting more. So many ultra processed ingredients, high fructose corn syrup, snacks loaded in sugar. My drink tasted bitter and I didn’t finish it all. Can’t say I plan to go back anytime soon.
  3. Visited my family in New York after about a year and a half. My flight credit was due to expire and the timing was about right so I figured why the heck not. I ended up working 4 out of the 5 days there 10-6. I saw one of my friends who got married in 2022. He and his wife are doing great. I don’t know how they have so many pets, I could only handle one maybe 2 small dogs. Not 5, 2 cats, and birds. My parents are getting older, in the back of my mind I need to start making effort to see them more often. Especially since they haven’t been here in about 6 years. This 1 bedroom apartment is tight for any type of company. While there helped do a little bit of decluttering, helped set up a new 2021 M3 MacBook Air, and wiped the 2018 so that my stepdad could use it. The sales guy at Microcenter was a bit on the pushy side and I basically told him no to the warranties, and some anti-virus software that really isn’t needed. Passing down the Mac hw was much more useful than the paltry $160 being offered for it. They still had the 17″ MacBook Pro I used in grad school (2006-2008) now with a swollen battery! The screen wouldn’t turn on, the keyboard was barely functional and the bottom case was a bit bent. I literally try to keep all my computers and cars close to mint and shook my head about it. There was another computer from 2007 I also tried to wipe as much as I could without the system install DVD. I enjoyed the trip but not the constant exhaustion or sleeping in my old XL Twin bed.
  4. Last summer I had a small ant investation in my laundry room light fixture. The pest control company did multiple treatments and the went away for a while. However for the last 2 months they’ve been back. Tonight they came out with a vengence, nearly 100 of them right outside of my door feeling displaced by activity I took days earlier to eliminate them. I bought any baits at home depot right before closing only to read the fine print they aren’t god for Carpenter Ants. It’s got me really thinking about moving though, I’m overdue for an upgrade. Was trying to hold out until my car payments were gone but not so sure anymore. I work from home and my desk is just a few feet away from these annyoing insects. I got a response from maintenance this morning. They are going to treat the mount on Monday. Fingers crossed I don’t have two nights in a row of this stressful experience but I’m not so hopeful.
  5. Prior to the NY trip I called Expedia to try and settle the matter. Was on hold over 2hrs 15 minutes and no one picked up the phone. I had the sense to use the chat with an agent who took an entire hour to resovle my issues. I was tempted to give up but that was $500+ of my hard earned money.
  6. Yesterday I took my car in for an alignment check and tire rotation. The young guy working there really liked my red seats. I asked the service advisor about my rusting lug nuts and he brushed me off just like the other dealership I went to. May just buy some black ones and home they don’t mess them up.
  7. Solar Eclipse – DFW was on a direct trajectory to see it and there won’t be another one like this for approximately 20 years. A dear friend gave me a pair of the glasses as to avoid permanent eye damage. Definitely one of the experiences where pics don’t do it justice.
  8. Not sure how fast I’m going to go on this but I reached out to Fidelity and reclassified my old employer stock purchase plan as a regular brokerage account. Also so glad I only put $20 in because the company went bankrupt not too long after I left. I wonder how my old coworkers who said to invest 100% in it with the belief it’s going to go up is feeling now. I’m adding $50 every week to it in addition to the $25/wk with my M1 acct. So a whopping $75/wk or $300/mo + the $2172/mo in my 401k and $742/mo into the Roth to play catchup for 2024. $3,214 feels like it’s close to the max I’m comfortable with given my income levels. Ideally I think I’ll need a total of $1-$1.5M invested, $2M to feel comfortable.
  9. Cleaning – I’ve had this steamer since moving into my apartment and for the most part it just collected dust. Earlier this week I grabbed it, started sweeping and using it again. How much dust accumulates on a floor and next to my washer / dryer was really an eye opener and kind of nasty to be honest. I will make doing this part of my weekly routine. I also cleaned out a pretty big chunk of my closet.
  10. Bf moves – He’s moving a lot closer to me for work / quality of life reasons. He really works hard between two jobs and I definitely am proud of him. His apartment might actually be nicer than me despite the age / income gap lol. I haven’t seen the specific unit in person but soon.
  11. Sports – Playing kickball and cornhole still. The latter has been a total bust, I haven’t been playing as well as before. We did win today’s kickball game so I’ll take it.
  12. Life and Death – Someone years ago I knew through the dating app scene but didn’t really have that dating connection with… recently passed away at 33 years old. He was funny, sassy, and I knew lots of people. Looking at a few of his pictures he lost a ton of weight and was looking a bit unhealthy to me. Not sure if it was gastric bypass related but what I’ve read on social media indicated it was unexpected. We last chatted in 2021 and I feel for his family and twin brother especially. RIP Justin.
  13. Health – It has been a struggle. The new whey protein isolate shake I bought absolutely destroys my stomach. People say the sugar substitute sucralose is part of the problem. I don’t know that for sure but not worth these crazy side effects. So back to the vegetarian option. I got my bloodwork done from my doctor and I’m going further into prediabetic mode so it’s been time to make changes. I tried to get Wegovy / Ozempic but insurance won’t cover it until I hit the $2,450 annual deductible. I’m only about $900 into it and it resets in August so that’s a no.
  14. iPad Pro – Apparently mine is about 90% battery. Lately with the latest release version of iPad OS the system has been rapidly depleting that just playing Youtube. Apple is offering $400 to trade it in as of today and a 3rd party offered me slightly less. Not sure if I need the latest and greatest for what I essentially use for watching YouTube and doing some light web browsing. Most of that AI stuff can apply to my Mac and iPhone. I say that now at least without having seen the final product.

Specific to my personal finance I know I’m doing better than most people. I was watching this video ‘Something Terring is Happening to Boomers’ and the guy said 50% have no savings and avg savings is $100,000. I’m near 3x that with about 20 years to go until I’m anywhere near that age cohort. For te presenter in that video he talked about income being greater than assets. My bare minimum expenses to live is about $3k/month or $36k. To have that in passive high yield savings acct income I’d need to have $720k with a 5% return rate. Still a long way from that The car debt is still a bit of a thorn in the side but I’m paying $1400/mo to knock it down. I started off financing $21,500 so 46% of the way there at 5.99% in 6 months.

5/4/20243/31/2024Difference% Change
401K254,172257,260(3,088)-1.2%
Roth IRA39,98639,0209662.5%
Brokerage Accts2,4152,367482.0%
Cash3,8463,39245513.4%
HSA3,0562,69336413.5%
Total303,476304,731(1,255)-.4%
Credit Cards065(65)-100%
Auto Loan11,55513,587(2,032)-15%
Net Total291,921291,079842+.3%
May 2024 – $292k Net Worth

So a game I started playing – Star Trek Online has you as the captain of a ship and you get into battle just like the tv shows / movies. April felt like I kept getting hit with phasers and photon torpedoes in the stock market. I just tell myself it’s paper money and being flat net worth wise month over month isn’t that bad. I see the stories of people at Tesla and other companies who lost their jobs and am like okay you’ve got it better than most. Same with homeless people with signs asking for money or sleeping under a bridge. A year ago my net worth was $186k so +57% in a year. I’m going to Vegas in June and need to buy tickets soon and car insurance hits next month. So even though I feel like I have a little bit of extra cash right now, it goes fast.

Anyway I’ve got to squeeze out a gym workout before we see this Challenger movie and do a cuatro de mayo dinner beforehand. Peace =/\=. If you’re still reading this, how are you doing?

Recessions, Bad Health and April 2023 Update – $195k

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3/31/20232/28/2023Difference% Change
401K$173,931$167,673$3,611+3.7%
Roth IRA$27,186$25,508$1,678+6.6%
M1 Acct$770$663$107+16.1%
Cash$3,135$3,635($500)-13.8%
HSA$3,030$2,988$42+1.4%
Total$208,053$200,468$4,938+3.8%
Credit Cards$0$163$(163)-100%
Auto Loan$12,938$14,382$(1,444)-10.0%
Net Total$195,115$185,923$6,545+4.9%
April 2023 Net Worth Update

March was a rough month, effectively sick for over 2 weeks and still have a lingering cough. Overall I’m doing much better now but missed out on some activities with friends and felt like a total hermit. The brother of someone I went on a few dates with on and off over the years passed after getting tonsil surgery in his sleep. Dude was literally the same age as me too. Also a guy I dated before the pandemic and am friends with now is dealing with complications from a relatively procedure he had in early 2022 and having thyroid problems. He’s currently on medical leave, unable to work, and likely will have to undergo two, possibly 3 surgeries. An acquaintence of mine lost his job of 8 years working for an insulation company, he bought a house a few years ago he saved up a long time for. Hopefully he lands back on his feet soon.

My neighbors moved out, didn’t have anything bad to say about them other than the smoke that I had to complain about a few times since it vented into my unit. There are actually 5 out of 8 units in this building that will be available here between now and July. Can’t say I fully blame them, the price they want for a 1br ranges between $1,316 and $1,447. I pay $1,134 and presumably that amount is going to increase. For the last few months I pay my rent 3-4 weeks early so I don’t have to worry about it. When I get paid next week I’ll make the payment for May.

I’m happy that I was able to make a dent in my auto loan balance, it’s still a stretch to pay $1,444 in car payments in a month. $2,163.56 a month (including matching) is going in my 401k, $500+ a month in the Roth IRA and $100/mo in the M1 account. Up $6,545 in a month or 4.9% in a year. Net worth is essentially flat to a year ago which is good considering I bought a new car in October and financed $26k.

The overall state of the economy is still concerning to me, I see lots of doom and gloom content one day on YouTube and the next day the stock market is having it’s best year ever… Clickbaiting at its finest. Even Michael Burry of The Big Short fame said he was wrong. By following a lot of these folks you can miss out on major gains. Between capital gains, missing the best days of the market in any given year, and not dollar cost averaging due to fear. I would however keep adding to that emergency fund and maintain some diversity in assets (something I still need to work on). The layoffs at many big companies is very much a real thing however, seems like the numbers keep going up.

Lastly a bit of a rant… I see more and more people who don’t take personal accountability for their actions. I don’t know exactly what the root cause is but after how many years do you still blame your parents, society, a person of a different race, gender, orientation, insert the blank. People would rather point the finger than take action and focus their energy on improving their situation. I’ve been guilty of it too and try to remind myself in new situations that I might be my biggest obstacle.

Case in point was some bloodwork I had in March. The numbers aren’t good but knowing is a big part of the battle. Cutting back on sodium, alcohol, drinking more water, and eating more vegetables is how I will claw my way back. Also playing kickball again starting this afternoon and I’m super excited. Much love. Don’t give up the good fight whatever that may be for you.

Spending Spree – February 2023 – $184k

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January 2023 has some to an end. I’ve been full on investing again, aiming to max out my 401k and Roth IRA contributions for the new tax year. What have I been up to?

Currently getting over both a double ear infection and a sinus infection. Took a half day at work last week but aside from that I’ve been trekking along as much as possible. Just started taking antibiotics yesterday after a week of suffering with various symptoms. My aim was to schedule everything before the big storms started to hit. Starting to feel a little bit better day by day…

I had my heart set on a job at a local company. I’m not particularly happy with how the process turned out. I thought the interview went well. It might’ve been a reach but the response was a bit cold. I told a friend about the experience and he knows the history… He agreed it wasn’t very personal / professional how it was handled. Having to e-mail a week after the first interview to schedule a follow-up one. Then not hearing anything for days and days. I even had a list of follow-up questions. I stayed up till 2:30AM one night trying to do extra research on the company and work on an online course for certification / continued learning purposes. Weeks of wondering what the outcome would be and high stress levels.

Deep in my soul I genuinely believe what made me sick was the stress of the experience and massive sleep deprivation. So I’m giving myself a curfew to crawl into bed and turn all the electronics off. That and dating… Coming up on 3 years single. I haven’t travelled with a partner since 2014. One guy I thought had potential to go out on a date… Posted a pic of a him and his bf one week, then not long later showed pictures of the two wearing their wedding rings while on vacation. We were just chatting in December and he gave the impression of being very much single. So I unfollowed and am trying to burn it from my memory. 3rd time something like this has happened to me. I am working through my trust issues.

Purchase 1 – AirPods Max – $541.24 inc. tax – This replaces a pair of noise cancelling headphones I’ve owned since 2018 that were okay but starting to show their age. No Bluetooth 5.x, no Dolby Atmos / Spatial Audio, lackluser noise cancellation, a bit prone to interference. So I sold them on eBay for $47.58 after fees. Net $493.66. Paid in full.

Purchase 2 – MacBook Pro 16″ M2 Max – $3,462.92 inc. tax – 32GB memory / 1TB storage / 38 core GPU – My Late 2021 MacBook Pro 16″ functionally was working fine. However I made the mistake of not getting enough RAM on the system. Literally everyday I used the computer it had to use storage as memory (swap) and things would slow down. I could not run Windows 11 or Linux on this system in a Virtual Machine due to the limitations. Apple offered $1025 trade-in, itsworthmore offered $1400 or 36% more. I also paid $20 at FedEx for a laptop box. I hopefully will get payment in the next 4 business days. Net $2,082.92. I currently owe the amount of the trade-in still on my Apple Card, then it’s paid in full. It sounds like a lot and it is but I use this everyday.

Purchase 3 – Replacement PowerBeats Pro earbud – $70 – I bought these to workout in December 2019. However the right earbud started to fail. Rather than completely toss them out I just bought a replacement.

Still owed – $647.10. I bought my car in October and cancelled my old warranty the day after I bought it. I e-mailed the dealer about it, then Nissan. Nissan told me to contant the company that issued the warranty. The warranty company mailed out the check and told me to wait nearly a month later before they could reissue the check. Then the day of they said the check came back to them. The left the last # off of my apartment #. Kind of infuriating but I tried to stay nice and professional during the whole process.

It’s a new month and I’m thankful to still have a job when several people I know have encountered layoffs. My rent is half what it would be near my hometown on Long Island. My hair is also starting to slowly grow back with my treatment plan. I did kickboxing last night with Apple Fitness and it crushed me in a good way.

1/31/20231/2/2023Difference% Change
401k$169,051$155,964$13,087+8.4%
Roth IRA$25,539$23,403$2,136+9.1%
M1 Acct$580$446$134+30%
Cash$3,377$7,002-$3,625-51.8%
HSA$3,104$3,1004+.1%
Total$201,650$189,915+$11,736+6.2%
Credit Cards$1,799$0$1,799
Auto Loan$15,973$16,909-$936-5.5%
Net Total$183,878$173,006$10,873+6.3%
February 2023 Snapshot

Between my 401k contribution, matching, and Roth IRA over $2,705/mo is going to retirement. $100/mo in my non-retirement account. That and double or triple car payments. About $2k of my HSA is invested but I could contribute more. Just not sure if I need to outside of the tax benefit. I also paid a ton in taxes last year, kind of makes me sick to my stomach. I don’t know how people who live in California or NYC deal… What’s also worth mentioning it that my rent is not only paid up for the month of February but also March as well. I also am not including the $2,047 I expect to receive back in the coming weeks in my total.

I also received a nice fat $2,218.86 in dividend payments on my 401k in December that gets reinvested. I was watching a video from Jarrad Morrow – This Is How Wealthy You Are Based On Your Age . Using the example as a 39 year old I’m ahead of the mean for Gen X which includes people upwards of 19 years older than me. Since I don’t have a home and there is no home equity I’m doing twice as well as the boomer generation. That’s fucking insane. I started with retirement contributions in June 2013 and sure as hell didn’t max it out before 2020. The $200k net worth is still elusive to me. Maybe if I would stop buying shit that would be different but it provides me with enjoyment.

Last but not least a big shoutout to Caleb Hammer on YouTube. Dude is in his 20s and his channel has gone gangbusters at 133k subs. Peace out, I need my beauty sleep.

No More Medical Debt – My Immediate 2017 Challenge

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Just when I thought I could sit down to smell the roses after paying off the student loan debts, appendicitis struck. Though my stress levels would be higher if I had the car loan, student loan, *and* medical bills.

There will be more bills next month when I get the appendectomy. A rundown of the bills so far are below. I was going to put it into a spreadsheet but didn’t have the inspiration at 1AM on New Year’s Eve. Not all of these are from the ER  directly. Some are followups after the fact and other include lab work.

So for the first phase I’ll be paying about $4,500 according to estimates. Aflac may reimburse me $1,000 based on 2 days spent in the ER. Getting an itemized bill from the hospital that I’ll submit next week. Worth the $125 that I paid for it. Trying to be as aggressive as possible in getting this debt gone. Unlike the car that is 1.9% fixed, the credit card will jump to ~13% Truthfully though my credit card is at 0% until January 2018. Go Chase Slate card.

I paid over $13k in student loans during 2016. The total for medical debt should be around half that. Thank god I have insurance though. Even with deductibles to hit, I’m still getting a pretty huge discount. Not how I wanted to start the new year, but it’s a short-term reality.

Thanks for reading my blog. Have a Happy and Safe 2017.

hospitalemergencyroombills

Hospital Emergency Room Bills after Insurance

Death of a Friend

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No I’m not talking about Prince. Though his death was definitely a shock to me. I have listened to his music since the 1980s. Took me about a week to deal with it. Nor am I talking about my father who passed away at almost 11 years ago after 19 years of health problems related to kidney failure.

I’m talking about the death of someone else I knew. Someone I was really interested in dating. His name was Chris. He was only 29 years old. His birthday is two days before mine. Chris had his fair of struggles in life. He confided in me with a few of them. I really wished I was able to do more. We unfortunately lost touch with each other last June.

Yesterday I went to look him up on Facebook and found that he passed away just over a month ago. **One Month**  I don’t know from what. I feel a sense of loss. I never met any of his family members. He wouldn’t let me get close enough to be a regular figure in his life. I tried a few different occasions. Work or other things going on his life got in the way. Wish I could hold him again and tell him to stay strong and that everything would be alright. He was a beautiful person inside and out, just wanted to see him at his true potential. Not working crazy hours at a hotel just to make ends meet. His family setup a gofundme page to help with burial expenses.

I’m just speechless. RIP Chris. You will be missed. Not just by me but by all the people you’ve touched. ❤

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